Finding Your Compass
How identifying my core values helped me discover my truest self.
For years, I followed a script—a checklist of everything I was supposed to do to be happy and successful. I did all the "right" things, chasing milestones that promised fulfillment. But with every box I checked, I felt more lost. Instead of feeling happy (or even just accomplished and satisfied) I was left wondering: When is this going to feel good?
So, I started over. I left my marriage, sold my house, and moved into my own space for the first time. I sat with myself (and my dog) every single morning—reading, journaling, and questioning everything I had once believed. It was uncomfortable and messy. There were many days where my handwriting was so chaotic I didn’t even recognize it. Days where my tears left water stains the pages I filled with every single thought, emotion, and experience - even the ugliest ones - that got me to where I was.
Me & Martin, the dog who got me through it all.
Through that process, I began to see what was real and what had been shaped by other people’s opinions and expectations. What I was supposed to want was replaced with what I actually want, and I began to remember who I was before everyone told me who I was supposed to be (thank you, Glennon Doyle, for these beautiful words that came to me at exactly the right time.).
Not at all by coincidence, around the same time in my work life, I was part of a few corporate rebrands where businesses were redefining their mission, values, and identity. They were evolving - learning from where they had been and identifying where they wanted to go. I realized I could do the same thing in my personal life.
It was time to write a new story, beginning with discovering my own core values.
Why Core Values Matter
Core values aren’t just a list of nice words - they tell your story. They are the foundation of who you are and how you move through the world. They shape the decisions you make, the people you surround yourself with, and the way you show up in life and work and everything else you do. Without them, it’s easy to drift—saying yes to things that drain you, staying in situations that don’t serve you, or feeling completely lost when life tries to knock you off course.
Defining my core values gave me clarity I had never experienced before. I finally understood why certain choices felt right while others felt forced. My values became my compass, guiding everything in my life - from the way I built my business to how I navigated relationships. And when I inevitably faced moments of doubt or uncertainty, they helped me get back to home base and remind me of who I was and what truly mattered.
The truth is, life will always be unpredictable. Growth will bring change, and transitions will shake things up. But when you have a clear sense of your core values, you’ll never be completely lost. You’ll always have a way to come back to yourself.
If you’re ready to define your own core values and use them as a guide to build a more aligned, fulfilling life, I’ve created a step-by-step guide to help you through the process.
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